Conversin’ with the Letter Senders

6 Aug

Me:
Every day I look longingly into the empty mail box praying that I’ll get something lovely and mysterious in return.
Elliott.

LS:
Oh Elliott,
Apologies, for the summer has proved busy! There are several letters waiting to be finished and sent, don’t give up hope! Ideas are flowing and changing and growing.

Me:
Understandable.  Though, that doesn’t mask my disappointment.
Elliott.

LS:
That’s perfectly reasonable, have you had a good summer at least?

Me:
Are you actually trying to bond with me on a personal (non-slightly creepy but wonderful) level!?
My summer’s been rather bland.  Work, reading, playing with my cat.  An unhealthy amount of Pokémon mixed in.
Why has your summer been busy?
Are we going to fall madly in love in the future?
Elliott.

LS:
Well aren’t you adorable.
Bond? Yes, maybe. Perhaps we find you interesting as an individual. You must realize there’s a reason we chose you, after all. Summer has been a whirlwind of work, laughing and flirting and going out constantly, and I am lost in this wild world of meetings and friends and LIFE. It’s delicious chaos. Are we going to fall madly in love? Well, seeing as only one of us knows you in real life, we doubt it. The two of you are not currently in love, and the others haven’t met you in person. And yes, I just gave you more information than you’ve ever had, but only because of our failure to send letters.
We grant you one honest answer to a question.

Me:
I was just giggling and jumping across my room.
I appreciate the little tidbits.  It is definitely the most information I have received.  I’m glad that I’m interesting.  I try to be a fucking darling while being pretentiously smart.  It’s just natural.
Your Summer(s) sound quite a bit more exciting than mine.  Then again, I read articles about the roles of gender relations in Pokémon.  Now, that was thrilling.
It’s nice to know that one of you knows me somehow.  If they’re located at the home base of Tacoma, then I dare them to say “Googly” while walking past me.
Anyway, question time.  I expect careful contemplation on this:
For each person involved (it would be great if you referred to each of you by your first initial or some symbol), what would be the sea animal you would ride underwater? …Given that you could do that whole breathing underwater thing.
Elliott.

LS:
This letter sender mass texted the others and have received the following responses:
C- A lapras, I know they don’t exist in real life but that would be fucking badass.
W: I’m all about Whale Rider. Whales whales whales. I love the sounds they make, and would love to hear it underwater.
L- Welllllllllll lets see here. I would want something delicate, like a jellyfish. I love going to the aquarium and just sitting in the jellyfish room for like an hour. Too bad they sting, and couldn’t support the weight of someone.
A: Ride underwater? Fuck that. I’ll swim and admire the pretty fishies instead.

Me:
C: Funny enough, my sister and I watched the Pokémon 2000 movie today which had Ash’s Lapras in it.
W – I love whales.  A lot of my songs are somehow related to whales.
L: We can just imagine that you’re as light as a jellyfish and won’t get stung.  I like the ones that get kinda fluorescent.
A – I admire you sticking to your humanly means.
Thanks,
Elliott.

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