Excluding Biases, I would like to think that I am very attractive… and narcissistic.
So, when it comes to the other male (me being Alpha, naturally) nearby, these are the reasons I find myself more visibly pleasing… or just pleasing in general.
- I have abs… not a gut.
- I am tall.
- I am not a gnome.
- I don’t crash vans.
- I’m not from the land of BIG (acquired peacefully from Mexico).
- Walls of Sweat and Fart and Odor and Dead Skin Cells do not go flying out my door every time I open it.
- My tan lines do not compare.
- I do not have that red pointillist upper arm shoulder thing.
- I have a strong face.
- With immaculate cheekbones.
- And killer sideburns that don’t look like worms growing out of my face.
- I shave without making a mess.
- And I’m toilet-trained.
- I’m adorable and don’t slap girls.
These are just the ones I came up with in a couple minutes. Yay!