Grout Humor and Other Distractions

12 May

I’m at work again… I seem to post a lot while at work.  Someone got here before me and pulled all of the charts.  So, I don’t have that much to do except…

GO TO THE MEN’S ROOM AND LOOK AT ALL OF THE GROUT HUMOR!

Okay, I was first introduced to Grout humor (“Hello Elliott, I’m Grout humor…” “Really, that’s grout!”) when I visited Reed college in Portland sophmore year of high school.  Then, I found some more of it in Powell’s Books a couple years later while scouring through their collection(s).

This is how it works: take a common phrase or saying and replace a word with “grout.”  However, it’s much more hillarious if you use a word that rhymes or has some semblance to grout to replace with.  Then, write your phrase or saying with a pen between the little grout lines in between tiles in the bathroom!  They’re infectious… all over men’s restrooms!  It’s great humor to (yes, I’m going to say it because when looking for examples everyone was being so modest) for when you’re poo-ing.

Want some examples?  HELLZ YEAH!

God is Grout
Alexander the Grout
Grout, Grout, Grout it outloud… These are the things we think Agrout. Come on!
Oscar the Grout
The Grout Wall of China
Grout Balls of Fire!
Grout Damn Spot!
The Grouts of Wrath
The Grout Gatsby
Groutcho Marx
Three Strikes and You’re Grout!
In Through the Grout Door
Look Grout Behind You! (Really creepy when it’s actually behind you, above the toilet)
What’s this Agrout?

Here are some examples of Grout jokes without the puns… but are still funny. However, they usually take more context to understand:

Treaty of VerGrout
Carry a Big Grout
Groutman
There’s Just Grout Between Us
There’s a Grout in the Movie Theater!
Do You Have Your Groutgun?

Here’s an example of what this Grout stuff looks like:
The Grout Wall by Afroswede.

Oh, the one above is from one of my favorite movies… The Grout, the Bad, and the Ugly.

Here are some of my reasons that grout puns are the best bathroom graffiti ever:
They’re puns!
They’re funny!
They’re not really that obscene!
They’ve taken a completley boring subject such as grout and made it interesting (!)
I’m tired of seeing advertisements for porn or other graphic stuff (the bathroom across the hall has a scribbled “voyerweb.com”)
Every other amount of graffiti in bathrooms is obscene and rarely funny (However, I enjoy the jokes about what the seat protector/covers are actually used for… such as one I saw in a pub one time that read “Bush Re-Election Party Hats”)
It takes a lot of skill to write in between tiles in grout (Yes, I have contributed to many bathrooms)

Well, I hope you enjoyed some info. on Grout Humor… spread the love!  Write some of these puns and come up with your own!  I think they need to be spread to girl’s bathrooms, now.

I’m going to be making a coolest villain’s list for at least the bat-verse because one guy made  a top 25 coolest comic book villains list and didn’t write any reasons.  What the hell!?  Also, I should probably get a new Super HeroiHot out before I put my computer in storage.

Damn… Rachel now has work for me.

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2 Responses to “Grout Humor and Other Distractions”

  1. Drew September 17, 2012 at 7:05 PM #

    Love it. They did the same thing at Sacramento State. English department men’s restroom. I had a usual urinal. Always was I face to face with “Oscar the Groutch.”

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. 1000 Things We Hate #188: Fake Mustaches « MechanisticMoth - September 28, 2011

    [...] with fake mustaches has stemmed with our nostalgic obsession with Groucho Marx (or known on the grout wall of groutness: Groutcho Marx).  He defined an age when he rocked his delicious [...]

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